Throughout my incarceration, I have participated in countless Masses where inmates are received into the Catholic Church. I’ve seen tears of relief and elation on their faces as they were baptized, received their first Holy Communion and/or were confirmed. 

These are some of our most powerful services, and every person in our little congregation is affected. You can feel the joyful presence of God as more of His children become members of His Church.

Because the Ohio Reformatory for Women (ORW) has a unique population, we don’t strictly adhere to the usual Easter calendar for receiving the sacraments. We’ve had baptisms and First Communions in September and confirmations in February – they’re always due to that person being released shortly afterward. 

I’ve sponsored many women who deeply desired to be part of the Church before they went back into the world. They might not have been part of anything good prior to their incarceration, and this gives them a better foundation and a spiritual home. 

I’ve heard more than once that after they returned to society, all they had to do was walk through the door of the nearest Catholic church and they felt like the Prodigal Daughter: welcomed, accepted and, most of all, loved.

Today, I want you to meet Amber. She is a 39-year-old inmate from Youngstown. She is going to receive all three sacraments in October. This is her story of conversion.

Amber’s mother is Baptist and her stepfather is Catholic. Her father is not in her life. While she was growing up, friends took her to many different churches in the neighborhood. Her stepdad took Amber to Mass at a cathedral downtown. 

She loved going to church as a child and remembered saying, “I want to go, that’s where God is.” Although she was never baptized due to her parents’ differing religions, she always felt most comfortable in the pews of the Catholic church.

Mass was the best part of her otherwise rough childhood. Amber’s life took several  drastic turns, and she was out running the streets and selling drugs by  age 12. She had a baby boy when she was 16, but she couldn’t care for him. Children services stepped in after  six months, and he was later adopted. She hasn’t seen him since, but the love in her heart remains steadfast.

Living primarily in survival mode made it difficult for Amber to stay connected to Jesus, but she tried. She could never remember the name of that church in downtown Youngstown, but she always remembered how to get there. It was like a spiritual GPS bringing her to a safe place. There she could find some temporary peace in the chaos of her life.

Years passed as she hopscotched between attending school and working various jobs. One of her regrets is that she didn’t graduate from high school. “I was just trying to keep it all together,” she says.

It didn’t stay together very well, she started doing drugs instead of just selling them and then addiction took over. She ended up in prison with a two-year sentence in 2019. 

She was in ORW for four months, and then was transferred to Northeast Prerelease Center in Cleveland. Her state of mind was not healthy, and she admits she “wasn’t ready to change,” so she did the basics: work in the chow hall and go to school.

When she was released, she says, “things were OK at first, but it didn’t last.” She worked as a telemarketer and lived with her mother, a recovering alcoholic. She tried to make ends meet but didn’t have the resources or help she needed. Sadly, she violated her parole and was returned to ORW for nine more months.

This time, she decided to do her sentence differently. She was ready to face her addiction, and some major life changes had to be made. Coming to Mass and enrolling in recovery programs were first and second on her list. “I had to find my way back to God,” she said, “and let Him take control of my life.” 

She knew as soon as she took a seat in our little chapel that she was in the right place, and it was the right time. Now, she helps the sacristans set up for Mass and has joined the lector rotation. She has also been participating in an intensive outpatient drug recovery program and is studying for her GED. She will graduate from the program and take the GED test in late fall.

Amber’s desire to be baptized is almost palpable. Receiving Holy Communion is what she hungers for. And her excitement over being confirmed is especially poignant when she talks about her chosen saint: Mary Magdalene. 

Through RCIA classes and a volunteer-led Bible study, she has learned about Mary Magdalene’s experiences and feels she can relate in a special way – her drug addiction reminds her of Mary’s demons. She is counting on Jesus to exorcise her addiction in a similar way that He drove the seven demons out of Mary Magdalene.

Mary Magdalene was one of Jesus’ most ardent followers. She was the first one Jesus appeared to at the tomb on Easter morning, and she became the “Apostle to the Apostles.” 

Amber has been inspired by Mary Magdalene’s example of thankful living combined with uncomplicated, genuine faith. So, she tries hard each day to model herself after Mary. She greets the morning with gratitude and finds some way to serve, learn about or strengthen her relationship with the Lord.

Amber will receive the sacraments in October and be released in November. Her first stop is that cathedral in downtown Youngstown – she now knows it is St. Columba. She will live with her sister this time and get a job in a nearby factory. Eventually, she would like  to reunite with her son.

She hopes to live in a way that shows her dedication to Jesus, and she wants to share what Jesus did for her in prison. In her own humble words, “I just want to do better.”

Michele Williams is an inmate at the Ohio Reformatory for Women.